And be careful you don’t become one! I did.

Yes, this past year has been unprecedented. Travel has varied between difficult to impossible. Everywhere I look there’s difficulty: forced mandates, confusing data, division between family, friends, coworkers. The list goes on and on.

When I look over my own experiences this last year, I see how gradually I’ve laid down the things that were important to me. Things I knew the Lord had given me to do. For some, it was time to let them go, or just take a break. For others it was pure neglect. I’ve felt oppression set in, apathy and depression sneak in. And somewhere along the line I abdicated my place in the Wall. I scooched, scooted and squirmed to avoid hearing what the Lord was trying to speak to me, to teach me. I placed more attention on the bad news, the sad news, or simply checked out, until I’d loosened the mortar enough to fall out of my place down onto the ground.

Now, looking up I see an empty hole in the Wall where I should be. I see other holes where other stones should be, and loose stones about to fall. And, oh dear, I notice I’m not alone down here on the ground.

What do I do now? Stay out of the way of falling rocks? Help secure the ones about to fall? Or soften the fall of the ones that do?

My life has become tiny down here. I must climb back up, resume my place in the Wall. It’s a monumental task some days. But as I start my journey rope ladders unroll, helping hands extend to grab hold of mine. Look! Someone planted a flag in my spot so I could keep sight of my destination. Pretty soon I’m tucked back into my place, secure, extending the same rope ladder, unfurling the same flag, for those others that fell, showing them that if I can do it, so can they, by golly!

Whether I’m set into the first course or the 10th, the view is much clearer from the vantage point of being where I’m supposed to be, doing what I’m supposed to do. My life is larger, more fulfilling, because I’m in alignment with my Heavenly Father when I’m occupying my place in the Wall.

Father, forgive me for succumbing to apathy and depression. I know it happens, but I see it now. Please help me to settle back into the Wall and begin again to embrace who, what, when, where and why I am. Remind me clearly that You have given me all I need to follow You. Strengthen me, my resolve, determination, resilience, and especially my belief, that You have all things in the palms of Your hands. In Your time and in Your way, work through me, draw me up closer next to You that I might be part of that golden reflection radiating Your Kingdom.


Candi Runyon

BYNA Prayer Director


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